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Destruction’s Log:

The Heavy Metals have suffered their first true defeat. Clearly the fickle winds of fate were not with them in this night.

Rockstar [Wields the Enchanted Axe of Simmons] and Night Shift [Part-Demon Vampire Blood Symbiote] returned to Dr. Devolution’s house to recover Gupta’s shrink ray. They used Devolution’s drill machine to bore back through to the house and emerged in the front yard and were immediately attacked by two drones (my drones resemble Samus from Metroid) and two war bots (I used the stats for war spheres but they looked like the robots Hordak used in She-Ra).

Rockstar felled one of the war bots easily; however, when he attempted to use his enchanted axe against one of the drones, the drone grabbed it and pulled as hard as it could against it, before releasing it to smack him in the head (he ate a crit fail). The remaining drone and war bot opened fire on Rockstar, wounding him.

Nightshift attempted to shield both herself and Rockstar inside a blood dome so that she could heal him. The drones and remaining war bot opened fire on the dome and destroyed it. A shot from one of the drones struck Rockstar and knocked him back and into Nightshift, injuring him anew and grievously wounding her (she took 4 wounds, but managed to soak one).

Recovering his wits, Rockstar teleported himself into the drill machine, and then pulled it in front of Nightshift to shield her from the drones and war bot. She entered the drill machine, and the duo decided to flee back into the tunnel,

Once in the tunnel they hatched a plan to undermine the house and collapse it. Unfortunately, for them the war bot pursued them into the tunnel. It fired on the fleeing drill machine and badly damaged it. Rockstar attempted to evade it, while Nightshift opened the cargo door, and attempted to use the prototype shrink ray on the war bot. She missed, and the war bot destroyed the shrink ray. Try as they might they could not lose the war bot. The war bot fired on them again and wrecked the drill machine.

Rockstar charged out of the wrecked drill machine and managed to destroy the war bot. The two decided not to complete the mission assigned to them, and walked back to the section of tunnel in which the drill machine had veered off during the chase, and began the long walk back to their lair. They contacted the lair and requested a ride back, and that they bring some explosives to collapse the tunnel.

DeeVee [A Technowizard from Rifts Earth] was on monitor duty at the time, and agreed to pick them up. He also said he had just the thing to collapse the tunnel.

What I have long feared in regards to the Heavy Metals has finally happened. Their usual tactics of kicking in the door and an all out assault have turned against them. I know they are still reeling from their defeat, but the shrink ray cannot be allowed to remain in the hands of the V’sori. They are going back in. This time I shall insist Talos and Chean complete the mission. Let  us hope they do not prove to be a disappointment as well.


[Savage Rifts] Episode VIII: Resistance Rap Battle

It’s been a ruff three weeks. Just a little dog boy humor from ol’ Jack. Lemme tell ya, there ain’t much to laugh at these days, except maybe Vic’s antics, but ol’ Jack is gettin’ ahead of himself.

As I said, it’s been three weeks since the walls came down around Firetown. Firetown… meh, might as well call it Firetown Prison now. Things are starting to get bad. People are getting sick, and there isn’t a damn thing Doc or any other sawbones can do.

Ol’ Jack did his best to rouse the feral dog boys and other rogue animals in Firetown, but his efforts amounted to nuthin’. When the Deadheads dropped the walls around us, they all went into the kennel and now don’t wanna come back out. Fine. They don’t want to be part of the solution, that’s okay with ol’ Jack, but he ain’t showin’ ’em the hole under the fence when we find it either.

We aren’t starving in this prison yet, but that ain’t gonna hold much longer. The Deadheads make food and water drops every few days, but now the gangs are starting to turn on each other, and it’s every burbie for themselves. Fer earned the ire of Vic after the last drop because she didn’t pick up the crate he specially ordered containing bananas and cream. Don’t ask me why he requested those two items specifically, but I don’t blame her a bit for not grabbing it. Who know what else was inside it. I’d rather face a squad of Deadheads than open one of Vic’s boxes. On top of all that the D-Bee Brain-Eaters and the Chrome Jackals are working together now. They’ve carved themselves out a small patch of turf. Rumor has it they are looking out for the people in the turf they claimed, so I guess that’s something. I would not want to be those people though when the check is due.


Oh boy…is he a mixed bag of nuts. Apparently one of his squirrel bots exploded a bit premature, allegedly due to Lizzy, messing around with them and stink bombs in Vic’s lab. Lets just say Vic’s willy is a bit chafed at the moment, and all of us are paying the prices because the only thing he’s comfortable wearing at the moment is that damn leopard print thong. Talk about things you never wanted to see. Ol’ Jack needs some bleach for his eyes after seeing that, and maybe a scrub brush to use on his brain.

Like ol’ Jack said even though we get regular supply drops, things are running low. We long since exhausted what we took from the other floors of the hotel. We heard rumors the market was still open and decided to go do a bit of shopping. Ol’ Jack wasn’t sure what we’d find, but a Grackle and an orge duking it out was not at the top of the list.

A crowd had gathered round to watch the two go at it. Apparently they were fighting because the proprietor of one of the stalls was selling rotten food. A few guys near the gladiators shouted at them blaming the other for the rotten food. Ol’ Jack caught a good strong wiff of magic. I don’t know what they were doing, but they were messing with the two lugs punching each other to death. Ol’ Jack relayed what he had discovered and we decided to cancel the fight. Doc gave some tranquilizers to Vic and Fer, enough to take down the two slabs of meat tenderizing each other. Of course, they didn’t use the tranquilizers on the ogre or grackle, they used them on the chaps standing guard over a terrified d’norr.

Ol’ Jack got into position and tossed a confusion whammy on the combatants. It only worked on the ogre. I guess the grackle was too stupid for it to effect him. Fat lot of good it did the ogre. HE blinked his eyes, wondered what the hell was going on, then received a shot between those same eyes from the grackle. IT might not have been what ol’ Jack planned, but it was enough to mess with the mages calling the shots.

Doc dropped a smoke grenade between them, but the mages were on the edge of it and they just stepped out. Roots erupted out of the ground and wrapped me up like one of those burritos I get from Juan’s Taco Truk. Doc got wrapped up too, but he looked more like a puppet dangling from strings.

Fer stepped close to one of the mages who’d trussed me up, and proceeded to make a snack of his magical energy. I almost felt sorry for the guy when he suddenly realized he was out of gas. Doc tried to shake himself loose of the roots holding him and ended up dislocating his arm (1st crit fail of the night). Vic blinded himself when his pistol exploded in his face and doused him with mace (2nd crit fail of the night). The mages decided that they needed to flee, and after grabbing their buddy vanished from sight and appeared a few blocks away.

Ol’ Jack was still trussed up. I couldn’t move a muscle. Thankfully, ol’ Jack don’t need muscles. I summoned up my energy and launched a trio of psychic knives at the fleeing baddies. It didn’t even scratch ’em. I knew I should have pumped them up. Fer cut Doc loose and Vic looked for something to rub on his face. Lemme tell you the sight of a grown man in a leopard print thong rubbing dried meat on his face and moaning “oh god, oh god” is not something ol’ Jack will ever scrub from his memory. Ol’ Jack took one last shot and managed to wing one of the fleeing mages, but that was it. I hate magic.

We had a few hours until sundown so ol’ Jack put his nose to use and found where the mages had holed up. It was a cozy little cottage in the middle of a bunch of ramshackle huts. Doc and Fer came with me, while Vic went to recover the shreds of his dignity. I crept up near the house but was spotted by the mages. We high tailed it, not wanting to get caught up in a battle with them at the moment. They stopped chasing us after a bit and returned to the house. The house then vanished. Son-of-a-bitch!…. Have I mentioned I hate magic?

If all that wasn’t bad enough some yutz named Overwatch hacked the P.A. system and proceeded to threaten the Deadheads. He told them that they had until midnight to lift the quarantine or he’d lauch his countermeasures directly against Chi-Town. I knew right then and there that among his kind, Vic must be completely normal, but to us normal folks, all these hacker types are fucked in the head.

So what does Vic do? He hacks the system and steals it away from Overwatch and goes off on a rant of his own. It was clearly a scripted speech because there is no way the infamous DJ Squirrelmaster came up with it on his own. Vic did the same thing, but in a more long-winded fashion. And people say ol’ Jack talks too much. This is one time they should have both shut up, because it did exactly what ol’ Jack thought it would. It drew the attention of the Deadheads.

The Deadheads regained control of the system and instituted a nightly curfew. Anyone outside after sundown would be summarily shot. Thanks jackasses! You couldn’t leave well enough alone. This is gonna put a serious crimper on our escape plans.

A new problem reared its head as we were heading back to the hotel. Magpie contacted us asking if we’d been to the Top Hat. We said Charlotte had cut us off because she’d gotten caught up in our bullshit again. Magpie asked what happened and we told her about the woman we ran into and showed her the footage. Magpie recognized the woman but told us to forget that for the moment, that we needed to get over to the Top Hat because the Deadheads were on their way.

Fer and Doc turned back toward the Top Hat. Knowing we needed a vehicle fit for carrying more people Ol’ Jack scrounged for one. He found a nice pick-up the other gangers must have missed. I hotwired the sucker and peeled away from the shack it was parked next too. It was curious no one came out to stop ol’ Jack.

The door of the Top Hat was locked when Doc and Fer arrived. Velia answered and told them to go away. Good thing Fer and Doc were in no mood for taking no for an answer. They pushed their way inside. Ol’ Jack showed up just after and announced the Top Hat was closed and everyone should get the fuck out. Fer and Doc found Charlotte. She looked bad and sounded even worse. She was showing all the same symptoms as everyone else who’d gotten sick. We loaded everyone up in the truck. Velia insisted on coming along too. As we pulled away we saw another one of those damn Disgenix trucks. If it hadn’t been so close to curfew ol’ Jack would have followed it and maybe gotten some answers.

We made it back to the garage and into the hotel just as the last rays of the sun disappeared behind the concrete walls. If we don’t find a way out of Firetown soon, or at least find out what the Deadheads are poisoning us with, Fer really is going to lose her sister. None of us have started showing symptoms yet, but Ol’ Jack suspects its only a matter of time.

Forget Vic’s little revolution party. I say we sneak out after lights out and find where those trucks are goin’. Maybe then we can get some answers as to what’s going on. Clearly whatever is going on in here, the Deadheads don’t want getting out. It behooves us to find out what and fast.

Episode VII: A Lit Fuse

Once the initial shock of what happened wore off, we set to work gathering resources we’d need and fortifying our position in the hotel. Doc and I scrounged for food, water, plastic sheeting, and duct tape. We didn’t know what that crap the drones were spraying was, but we didn’t want to find out the hard way either. Fer busied herself with sealing off the windows, while Vic locked down the floor we were on using his hacking mumbo jumbo. Once all that was done, ol’Jack went for a drive.

The Coalition had turned most of Firetown into some sort of goddamn prison. The walls had been dropped with almost pinpoint precision. There were no gaps between them, nor any gates leading out of the area that had been cut off. I saw movement atop the walls. They were being manned, with orders to shoot to kill no doubt. Climbing the walls wouldn’t be an option, not with Dead Boys gunning down anyone who tried. Ol’Jack reckons also that anyone trying to fly up and over the walls would likewise be shot down. The Coalition had us right where they wanted us, and they were high on keeping us there. It was almost like they had quarantined us off from the rest of the Burbs. Given the rumors we’d heard a while back, I’d lay even money that bastard Lyboc’s fingerprints were all over the operation.

Ol’Jack reported back and we decided the next move was to see if there was anything to be gained by visiting the Recruitment Center that had been attacked a few days ago. Ol’Jack was curious if the ISS had high-tailed it before the walls fell or if the Coalition had trapped these “heroes of humanity” in here with us. A large group was gathered outside the center, so we pulled the car behind the Top Hat and mingled with the mob.

Turns out there were some ISS left. The mob had killed three of them by the time we arrived and a piece of manmeat was working on the last. I told him to break it up. He did, but it was too late. All Doc could do for the guy was put him out of his misery. Ol’Jack then told the mob to break it, up and go home, that we’d all work together to figure out what was happening. Once they begin to wander off we talked to Doc’s mystery woman.

She was wearing Payne’s colors, but none of us knew who she was; though Doc seemed to think she was familiar. We tried to get some info out of her, but she was tight-lipped as a grunt using hemorrhoid medicine as lipbalm. She vanished, so Fer, Doc, and ol’Jack got to work.

The recruitment center was a wreck. The doors had been beaten down, windows, smashed, and the place trashed – probably in the ruckus of the mop dragging the agents out. We found lots of what ol’Jack suspected was dirty paper, trouble is ol’Jack can’t read. Neither could Fer. We heard boots and hid. Turns out it wasn’t necessary because it was the lady in Payne’s colors and some of her goons.

First she wanted to know where Fer was. If she didn’t know that was a plus for us. Ol’Jack smarted off to the broad and told her “Our companion perished in the garden, the lions ate her”. She didn’t like that, but let it go. Then she started asking about that strange stone tablet we found. She wanted to know where it was. Ol’Jack mouthed off again and one of her goons tried to coldcock me. Seeing that didn’t work he got handsy, and tried to muscle it outta  me. I didn’t know why this bitch wanted the tablet, but knew it wouldn’t be good if she got it, so I lipped off again.  That was when she switched tactics, and asked us if we really wanted to go up against Payneman.

What the hell did Payne have to do with this? Naturally I asked, but like I said the bitch was tight-lipped. She told us Payne wanted the tablet and she was told to get it. She didn’t ask any questions. Maybe she should have. That’s when little Miss Bitch played her hole card. One of her gorillas brought in Fer’s sister.

Now don’t get ol’Jack wrong, I’m not against taking a hostage if the situation calls for it. Miss Bitch demanded the tablet in exchange for Charlotte’s life. Ol’Jack relented and agreed to lead them to the tablet. One of her goons watched us out the door, and ol’Jack led the parade across the street to the Top Hat. I had a half-formed plan that if we could get close enough to the barrel of acid, all the baddies would get a nice hot shower. Fer started the party early though.

Fer had remained hidden and opened her comms so Vic could hear what was happening. Vic had stolen a car and drove like a bat out of her to a hill near the Top Hat. He got out and started sniping the goons. She was seething at the goon holding her sister, and came out like it was Halloween. She shanked the goon before he even knew what him him. My dance partner soon realized why ol’Jack doesn’t neck on the fist date, when ol’Jack latched onto the goon’s neck and tore his throat out.

Things got bad then. Miss Bitch activated her chainsword and stalked toward Fer, but at the last second decided to cut down Charlotte. Bad move Bubbles. The chainsword ripped and tore across Charlotte’s chest and dug into her left arm. Normally Fer might have turned tail and ran, but seeing her sister cut down enraged her. Doc scooped up Charlotte and dashed over to his clinic. At the time we had no idea whether she was alive or not, but if anyone could help her, Doc could.

A few more goons fell. Now ol’ Jack was close enough he could put his plan into motion. He reached out with his mind and grabbed hold of the barrel full of “hot sauce” and directed over Miss Bitch’s head. I tipped the barrel all the way over intending to reduce her to a puddle of goo, but the squirrelly bitch got out of the way. Trouble is getting her out of the way put her right in the path of Fer.

Fer shook her with a few swipes of her vibro-knives. Then thinking I was a genius and desiring to make it easier for Fer, I attempted to put the now empty acid barrel on Miss Bitch. I missed. Fer wound up wearing the barrel as improvised armor. Sorry Fer. Vic took fire from the remaining goons as Fer and I danced with Miss Bitch. He took a couple shots to the shoulder. He was down but not out.

Fer shook off the barrel, and I attempted to jam my vibro-blade into the bitch’s throat, but missed due to her thick dermal plating.  It did provide the opening Fer needed though and she rammed her vibro-blades into the ribs of Miss Bitch and jerked them up until she heard a crunch. The last two goons bugged out and we hurried to Doc’s to check on Charlotte.

Charlotte had been hurt bad. She was in a coma, and Doc had had to amputate her left arm. In any case, she couldn’t be moved. So we spent the next few days fortifying the clinic and keeping an eye on the Top Hat. Ol’Jack went to retrieve a few personal effects and the tablet. When I went to Vic’s room it was trashed. Someone had been looking for something. That was probably when Miss Bitch and her goons grabbed Charlotte.  I told Vic about it and he panicked.

Vic pulled footage from Miss Bitch’s cyber eye showing her talking to a figure that clearly was not human. It was emaciated with sickly gray skin, wiry oily black hair, and it wore tattered robes. This is the figure that wanted her to get the tablet. We weren’t sure, but most of us thought it might be Payne himself. No of us knew because none of us had ever seen Payne. While he did that, Doc harvested Miss Bitch’s cyber arm and attached it to Charlotte. It wasn’t her natural arm, but it was better than the alternative.

We talked about our next move. I think we agreed we needed to reach out to the Coalition. Ol’Jack doesn’t like it one bit, because it’s essentially a death sentence if they catch me. We’re running out of options though. Thanks to the revelations of Miss Bitch we weren’t sure we could trust Payne or anyone in his organization anymore. Reaching out to the Dead Heads should be our last resort.

Charlotte finally woke up and she was not happy. She was not happy we had dragged her into the middle of our shitstorm. She had paid a high price for it. First by being kidnapped, then nearly dying, and then losing her arm on top of it. Needless to say she was pissed at all of us. Fer turned yellow and tried to pin the blame on Doc. I don’t blame her, she was trying to deflect the blame to someone else to ablate Charlotte’s fury. Yeah Doc had saved her life, but had it not been for us, she wouldn’t have been in the situation to begin with. Charlotte gave us all the heave-ho. I don’t know if that means we’re fired, but Fer thinks its best if we give Charlotte time to cool off. Doc took some medicines to Charlotte before we let telling her she would need to take them if she wanted to go on living. She slammed the door in his face – after she took the meds from him – she isn’t stupid.

It had been a heavy day, so we went back to the only place we had now – our new digs at the Park Hotel.

We’re in one hell of a pickle here. Charlotte is pissed which means the Top Hat is off limits. We can’t trust anyone in Payne’s organization, and I don’t trust the Coalition either. One thing is certain, we gotta find a way outta this prison in which we find ourselves before the fuse the Coalition lit erupts into the War of Colors.


May 6th, 2018
Wanted Level: 10

Lemme tell ya, Vic’s buddies have a knack for getting the Prophets into more trouble than we can get into on our own. Naturally when one of them wanted to meet with Vic about “something big” the rest of us tagged along. Like usual it was a goddamn set-up.

We showed up using the cover story of being plumbers. I gotta hand it to Vic, when it comes to layin’ the bullshit on good and thick, there ain’t much better at it than he is. Figurin’ we were walkin’ into a trap, Vic had the good sense to call ahead. Turns out the call was being redirected and someone on the other end was feeding the one manning the phone what to say to us. They were real keen on getting us inside the building. Vic and Ric went inside they building and that’s when all Hell broke loose.

A nasty little surprise nearly took out Vic and Rick, but they managed to walk away from it with only a few scrapes. The rest of us started taking fire from a nearby building. Ol’ Jack caught the scent of dog boys and tracked the scent to a nearby building. I didn’t go running up the stairs though. I waited at the bottom with my vibro-knife drawn for some yutz to come running down.

Ol’ Jack didn’t have to wait long. One of those losers from the Chrome Jackals came running down the stairs and tripped over Jack’s foot. Dumbass should have watched where he was going. He went sprawling in the dirt and ol’ Jack drove the point home by placing the tip of his blade at the back of Rover’s skull and told him to “stay”.

Fer and Doc had their hands full with the other snipers. Ric and Vic came back down and got their guns and laid down some fire of their own. Let’s just say Rick went off his nut when he realized who we were dealing with. A beefy mountain of a dogboy grabbed Doc and threatened to off him unless we backed off. Rick had blood in his eyes though and stalked off after the Doc and his dognapper.

The dogboy started crushing the life outta Doc, but learned real fast why it was a bad idea to get up close and personal with someone that can suck away your life force. Doc looked like he was blissed out on some of his Old Spice, but Vic and Rick finally managed to get Doc away from him. The dogboy took off like a scared rabbit. Vic and Fer followed him while Rick, Doc, and I had a chat with my doggie.

Rick was merciless as he talked to “Ricky”. He got Ricky to cough up what he knew of where the Chrome Jackals hung out as well as a list of those he was hunting. Turns out the Chrome Jackals had been hired to keep us from leaving the building. He let Ricky live. Ricky started to run before ol’ Jack spun him around, stared him down, and growled at him to “Run”. O’ Jack thinks Ricky may have pissed himself. Damn that was fun.

Fer and Vic followed the dogboy to a ramshackle apartment. Inside was something to make you sick. There was a mom and young kid tied to the chairs. Vic and Fer got blindsided and came too bound to the chairs as well. Worse there was a camera on them. Soon the dog boy appeared. His robot eye moved in sync with the damn camera. He moved over to the woman and tore her to shreds in from of the kid, Vic, and Fer.

We hightailed it to their position and took out the cybered up jackal. We cut everyone loose, but it was too late for the kids mom. The kid himself was pretty much catatonic. Ol’ Jack figured now would not be a good time for the kid to see another dogboy so soon after seeing his mother mauled by one, so he stayed outside while the others did what they needed to.

Afterwards, Rick took his share of the money we got from selling the weapons and rode off into the sunset in a shiny new mountaineer atv. The rest of us decided it was probably a bad idea to go back to the Top Hat so we decided to take a few days off and enjoys a few restful days at a hotel.

We thought the end of it. Turns out it was just the end of the damn beginning. Sirens started blaring and choppers whupped into view overhead. All of ‘em were carrying huge stone slabs about a hundred feet tall. Before we could even react, the choppers started dropping the stones in a circle around Firetown. It wasn’t what the Coalition usually did when a burb got too rowdy. Usually, they’d bring in a few bulldozers and raze the area. This time it seemed like they were cutting us off from everything else.

I’ll tell ya, ol’ Jack don’t like this one damn bit….

This came about from me thinking “what if the adventures of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe inspired a whole culture in the Rifts universe.” My idea is that a group of friends finds old dvds of the cartoons and is so inspired by them that they create an entire society around it. He-Man becomes a juicer leading the New Masters against the forces of  the evil shifter, Skeletor (his uncle). Man-at-Arms is a techno-wizard, Stratos is a Lyn-Srial Sky Knight, Beastman is a Simvan Monster Rider, Whiplash is a Grackletooth. I see so much potential in this idea. Here then is my first conversion.


Episode V: A Simple Delivery Job
Wanted Level: 6

Fer’s sister was not happy about having a crate of Naruni weapons in the basement, and probably even less so about having a crate full of Pre-Rifts contraband. Ol’ Jack knows from personal experience the latter would get the Coalition’s dander up more than a crate of weapons. Needless to say she wanted it out of the Top Hat ASAP.

Fer and I began working our connections to see who was interested in the haul. Jax was interested but low-balled me on it. Fer’s contact low-balled her too, but at least it was better than what Jax was offering, which was better than nothing, and with the ISS being on heightened alert, we did not need that stuff hanging around. We took the deal with Fer’s contact (I probably pissed off Jax by cutting him out of the deal) and arranged to meet at the Park Hotel Parking Garage for the transfer.

Not long after that we were approached by a guy flanked by two green skilled cavemen, orcs or ogres from the look of them. I dunno because I didn’t ask. Guy called himself Cutter and asked us if we were interested in a simple procurement job. The money was good and all he needed was for us to pick up some electronic components from Gordo’s Salvage. With all the heat though especially with what went down there yesterday, I wanted a little more compensation from Little Enos Berdette. So ol’ Jack sweet talked him into $5K up front and a total of $10k on delivery if we were able to get everything he needed. He was a bit hesitant, but agreed. Fer was a bit hesitant, but all ol’ Jack saw was dollar signs.

It was looking to be a profitable day for the Prophets. Might even be able to buy a few mods for my jalopy; hell maybe even a better jalopy. A truck would be nice, especially for some of the areas ol’ Jack has to deliver to. Maybe something with a machinegun turret….

Ol’ Jack should have known Lady Luck was do for a turn. Things were going too well. Before heading out we stopped by Vic’s room to see if he could get us schematics for Gordo’s Salvage. No such luck. The idiot was probably passed out from “product testing”. We’d have to go in blind. Not a problem. We’d poke around a bit and see the best way to achieve our objective. No sense someone getting hurt if it wasn’t necessary, especially us.

Wouldn’t you know it? Just as Fer and I step outside the front door of the Top Hat we see a gathering at a nearby building with a vid screen showing Coalition Recruitment Propaganda. Just our luck too, some loony toon ran out of the shadows, spouting his revolutionary garbage, and pulled the pin on his suicide vest in the middle of the crowd. Fer would have walked right into it if ol’ Jack hadn’t slung her to the ground in the nick of time. Probably another one of them Tolkeen Retribution Squad Idiots. Needless to say we didn’t hang around to find out. We hightailed it to the alley, loaded up the crates, and got the hell out of there before ISS could begin going door to door.

Our first stop was to get rid of the crates. Fer’s contact was as good as his word, and paid the money. He was keenly interested in how we’d come by a crate of Naruni Weapons and told us that if we acquired anymore he would be interested. Of course, the jag-off was interested he made out like a bandit. Still we walked with $300K which was nothing to sneeze at. Next time (if there is a next time) I think we’ll ask for more.

Next stop was to scope out Gordo’s. There was a dilapidated warehouse across the street from it and I pulled the car into it. We surveyed ways to get in to Gordo’s from here, but none of the ideas were viable – well not without acquiring some specialized gear and we didn’t have time for it. So we simply took a little stroll.

There were a few ISS agents out front, as we walked we sussed out a plan in that Fer would go in and get the guys in the shop to gather the parts for us and I would come in playing the vicious dogboy routine to distract them so she could five-finger discount the parts.

She waited while the monkeys working the shop got to work. I took a stroll down to the market and procured a can of shaving cream. Ol’ Jack would have preferred Reddi-Whip because Barbasol tastes like shit. Supplies in hand I walked back to the shop just as the monkeys finished gathering the stuff.

Time to do my thing.

I stood in the waiting area for a moment and lathered up my snout. Then I threw back my head and charged the counter on all fours barking and snarling like a crazed rabid dog. The chimp that had been gathering the parts hightailed it up into the shelves. Gordo must have been part monkey too because upon seeing me he suddenly became a monkey as well. I winked at Fer who gathered the loot and fled.

Gordo started calling for his security. A walking mountain of a grackle tooth walked out of the back room. I grinned and wiped the shaving cream off with a rub of my hand. Time for the second half of my performance.

With him bearing down on me, I started whimpering and giving the sad puppy dog eyes routine. I rolled over on my back and whimpered some more. He scratched my belly and called me a good dogboy. It’s kind humiliating. Then ol’ Jack pulled a tennis ball from his jacket and playfully growled “Play?”

The idiot took the bait and hurled the ball right out the door past the ISS guys. Shit I forgot about them. Ol’ Jack heard Gordo ask the Grackle why he did that and he told him that I wanted him to throw the ball. I did. He did, and like a good boy I chased it. Gordo then realized he’d been bamboozled and the chase was on.

Fer and I ducked through alleys as we worked to lose the ISS agents that started chasing us. Eventually we shook them and made it back to the car. We’d managed to get eight of the components at discount prices, but apparently the other four were to high-end. Gordo had told Fer about Al’s Electronics and went to pay him a visit.

Fer felt bad that we were considering stealing from a man who just about everyone liked. I told her she could feel bad later when we were tooling around Firetown in a flashy new Mounatineer ATV.

Turns out Al didn’t have the parts either, but said he might in a few days. We thanked him and drove away. We couldn’t risk going back to the Top Hat just yet, but we needed somewhere to make the trade with Cutter (if that was his real name). I decided payback was a bitch and I called Magpie. I took great pleasure in knowing I’d had to wake her up.

Naturally, Magpie thought we had something to do with the suicide bombing. Ol’ Jack told her it wasn’t our doing this time. She helped us out with a place to make our trade – a bar called Celezini’s, told us to ask for Elena.

Before we went to the bar ol’ Jack called in a favor from his buddy Asgon. Yeah I know I’ve heard the joke a hundred times. He’s as good as gone. Asgon is a Fennodi, but unlike others of his kind, there is nothing quiet about him. He agreed to watch our backs at the meeting.

Elena was interested in our story, especially the part where I mentioned I’d had to wake up Magpie. She advised me not to do it twice. The results would not be pretty. I told her it was payback. She still advised against it. Good to know. She let us use the room in the back for our meeting.

The patrons of the bar weren’t happy when my loud mouthed buddy walked in, and Elena didn’t exactly warm up to him when he put his feet up on the table leaving scuff marks from his boots. The bikers in the bar looked like wanted to take Asgon out back and beat the shit out of him, Fortunately for him, Cutter and his crew arrived.

The bikers and Elena were cowed by the sight of Cutter’s muscle. The same two green-skinned mounds of beef he’d brought with him before. The bigger one closed the door and gave us some privacy as we completed the deal.

Naturally Cutter was curious about the presence of Asgon. I explained why he was there. We showed Cutter the case containing the eight pieces were able to get. He nodded his approval and the other goon slotted his card and ol’ Jacks completing the exchange. Fer was curious exactly what the components were being used for and Cutter reiterated his early assertion of a communications device. Something didn’t seem right to Fer and in a rare moment of courage pressed harder. Ol’ Jack didn’t want to insult our hosts by getting his blood on the table so he thanked Cutter and told him it was a pleasure doing business. As Cutter left he cryptically said something about us potentially having more work from his employers. Creepy.

Needless to say Elena let us have it after Cutter and his crew left. THey didn’t like the more monstrous looking d-bees in the bar because they were trouble makers. Ol’ Jack apologized. She told us Celezini told us to tell Magpie hello for him and I told her I would when she woke up, but apparently her boss? wanted me to wake her up and vidcap it. That can’t be good.

We walked out of Celezini’s another $8K richer, but just as hard up for information, especially when we saw a familiar looking truck drive by with the Desgenix logo on the side. The last time we’d seen a truck like that we were getting rid of it after the Brain Eaters job. Was this just another truck or was it the same truck? What was weird was seeing it right after we completed the deal with Cutter. Were the two connected? It would probably take bigger brains than ours to find out.

Note: By the end of the session the Wanted Level had increased to 7!

Episode IV: Deepening Shadows
Wanted Level: 4

Last night the Coalition was obviously in a snit. Rumors were flyin’ all over the place this “morning” of a huge CS strike in the East Side of the market. Just goes to show you that even when we try to fly under the radar there’s other whackjobs out there workin’ to make life just a bit more difficult for the rest of us. Thanks alot jackasses.

Doc received a visit from that reporter that has a problem with him. Turns out the snoop took some incriminating photos of Doc passing some pills to the gangers at Fer’s little meet and greet and was threatening him with them. Bad move. You don’t threaten one of the Prophets.

We talked a bit about how to find the burby bitch at The Top Hat. Well I should say everyone else talked about it, ol’ Jack had to start getting everything ready. Nothing was really settled except Vic created a rumor online that “Burger Brian” has info on people disappearing from the park and linked it back to the snoop stalkin’ Doc.

Fer was a nervous wreck. She started the day off by hitting the bottle pretty hard. When ol’ Jack asked her about it, she told him about the drug deal she had later. No wonder she was hitting the bottle. Ol’ Jack poured her a double. She’d need all the liquid courage she could get.

After that things devolved into an impromptu advertising meeting as the Prophets tried to come up with slogans for Doc’s newest designer drug. I think my favorite was “Remember, if your grandfather hadn’t tried Old Spice, you wouldn’t be here.

Fer and Doc left soon after to go to their arranged meeting. I heard about it from Fer later on. It took another double to steady her nerves afterward to get the story.

The deal went bad. Fer and Doc were told in no uncertain terms to get out of the drug business, because the Shadow Masters didn’t take kindly to the Prophets horning in on their territory. In return they’d make sure the pretty little girl we were trying to recover would stay safe. The presence of sharp pointy objects sealed the deal for Fer. Who agreed “no more drugs. Just please don’t stab me.” Negotiating may not be her strong point.

That snoop tailin’ Doc showed up again. Fer bird-dogged him and tailed him home. While waitin’ for the other Prophets to show up so they could take out that guy, an old friend of Fer’s tracked her down and asked for her help. Nothing too dangerous he said, just a simple retrieval mission. According to him it was just a few crates of goods containing some Pre-Rifts artifacts and some Naruni guns. What he mentioned next, was who had taken his shipment.

Yup you guessed it. The Shadow Masters.

These creeps were everywhere the last few days. Apparently, they had ganked the shipment and he wanted it back. He offered us one of the crates of weapons. Fer figured they could be fenced for a tidy profit, so naturally agreed. Fer’s friend reiterated what Fer and the others were now sure of – the Shadow Masters were moving people (and drugs, and who knows what else). She agreed and let him show her where the stuff had been taken.

Meanwhile Doc & Richard had a talk about how to deal with the snoop. Richard promised he wouldn’t kill the reporter, but Doc wasn’t sure what he had planned for him was any better. I gotta admit his idea while creative was disturbing to me too. Like Doc said, “Is squirrel-based psychological torture that much better than murder?”

Richard went off to ‘deal’ with Gavin. He drugged him and he fell asleep to the sound of “Badgers, Badgers, Badgers”. Rick destroyed all evidence of the drug deal, and printed a mock pamphlet from his printing presses which he later handed out. Then took mister snoop out into the woods, covered him in peanut butter, birdseed, and cheap booze, along with a fabricated cab receipt. It’s clear to ol’ Jack that Rick has been spending way too much time with Vic.

At a parking garage just outside Firetown.

The place hadn’t been used in a while from what I was told. Something ate one of Vic’s squirrel bots and triggered its smoke grenade. The goons guarding the place were taken out pretty easily. It was what was inside that would give the Prophets trouble.

A monster made of multiple corpses crawled out from the lower depths. I tell ya the Burbs get weirder all the time. Sure it spooked the Prophets but we’re a hardy lot – well most of us are. It wasn’t alone either. It had buddies that crawled out of the woodwork.

The big terrifying slab of meatsickle grabbed one of the smaller ones and put a whole new spin on “togetherness”. The thing’s body tuck to it like the damned thing was made of that sticky-assed paper you used for catching flies. Rick reportedly slashed a hole in its belly and gave it a live “Bun-in-the-oven”. The little ones were killed or scattered but the big one seemed unfazed and just plugged the hole in its body with a corspe-bandage. Fer’s friend got a little close to the action and got a bit roasted by the explosion.

For all his flaws apparently, the answer to all problems is to give Vic an automatic rifle. He rained fire down on the corpses sending ’em back to hell along with their sticky-fingered buddy who had engaged in a slap fight with Ricky.

Doc stabilized Z’Reni, and in the lower level of the garage we found Z’reni’s crates and truck, plus an extra crate of old artifacts, books, and a stone tablet with unrecognizable writing on it.

Our take for the job is a crate of Naruni weapons and the wooden crate of artifacts. Vic was ecstatic. In the crate was the Holy Grail he’d been searching for – a dvd called “V for Vendetta”.

Why does ol’ Jack always miss out on all the fun? These double shifts are nuts (see Vic’s squirrel escapades are even getting to me). I tell ya Fer’s sister needs to hire some more people to work so ol’ Jack can do what he does best.

Episode III: All about that bass.
Wanted Level: 3

Ol’ Jack really needs to beef up the security on his electronic logbook. I opened it to make a journal entry and the damn thing was infested with squirrel porn. I tell ya, Vic is screwed in the head. He laughed his ass off when ol’ Jack confronted him about it. The other prophets thought it was funny too. Hilarious. Here’s a tip from ol’ Jack: When you got a buddy with a screw loose who’s a bit too handy with a computer, you just do what ol’ Jack did and threaten to bite the offender in some very uncomfortable places until he fixes the shit.

Noon is too early for listenin’ to Vic yak. Vic was yammerin’ about creatin’ a bunch of robot squirrels for information gathering purposes, which ol’ Jack gets, but then the loon wanted to create his own movement to “stop the squirrel invasion.” The guy is certifiable. I think Doc should check out his leaky brainpan.

Breakfast was interrupted around noonish by one of Vic’s friends. Don’t people ever sleep? It’s bad form to show up unannounced at chow time, especially when all of us were up until the wee hours of the morning getting rid of all the evidence from the warehouse job. The dame’s name was Lizzy. She told us a sob story that five guys from an unknown gang were seen grabbing her kid sister and dragging her into any alleyway. Where they all vanished completely. Naturally Vic offered to help which means we offered to help. Way to volunteer us dude. Well ol’ Jack would have helped, but he was scheduled for a double and none of the other Prophets would trade him shifts.

Now don’t take as gospel what ol’ Jack is about to tell ya, because he wasn’t there for any of it. Like I said, I got stuck pullin’ a double at the Top Hat. I heard all this second-hand from the rest of the Prophets and ol’ Jack is pretty sure they laid in a copius amount of bullshit rebar to hold the story together.

They went to Tandum Street where the kidnappers were said to have taken Lizzy’s sister from an alley between that deli that the Tandum Gangers hang at and some clothes shack across the way. They poked around a bit and hit nuthin but dead ends. They did find out that this new gang seems to be makin’ waves in the Market, and were able to follow a kid sporting the gang’s colors.

Ol’ Jack is kinda glad he missed the next part. The prophets had to pass an ISS checkpoint, and ol’ Jack probably would have set off all kinds of warning bells about what a dog boy was doin’ in Firetown and out of uniform. Thank heaven for small favors. Vic was able to bullshit his way past the cop and avoid any Coalition entanglements.

The Prophets followed the kid to a place called Tillie’s Night Club. Vic worked his magic, and hacked Tillie’s system and set himself up as that evening’s DJ and sent the DJ that was supposed to perform at Tillie’s over to the Top Hat. The kid he sent over wasn’t half bad. From what Vic said, he copped the playlist of another DJ, erased that DJ’s ownership and set DJ Beastmaster (himself) up as the originator. What kind of symbol did Beastmaster choose? Yup, you guessed it – a damned squirrel.

Fer told me she managed to score a meet and greet with some of the gang members. Apparently, they weren’t too hard to impress after she wowed their muscle with a glow stick. She and Doc fixed up the groupies with what they called “Old Spice” and gained the attention of the leader of the crew, a fella by the name of “Dalt” who set up a drug deal to take place at the 11pm showing of “Long Live the Emperor” at the Sineplex near Prosek Towers. Word is Fer panicked tossed her cookies soon after despite holding them in during the sit down.

Naturally Vic’s DJ routine was just so he’d be close enough to hack the security feeds in Tillie’s. Of course, the cameras in the VIP areas didn’t have sound, but a bit of bad lip-reading led them to find out about an abandoned warehouse where this gang makes their drops. What is it with warehouses?

After the show, the Prophets took a field trip to visit the warehouse. They locate a mass grave under some rubble, but no sign of Lizzy’s sister, which ol’ Jack guesses is a good thing considerin’ all the bodies were emaciated and showing signs of some disease. Just hearin’ that made ol’ Jack wanna wash up. Doc took a few samples, and Vic called Lizzy to let her know they hadn’t found Kat yet, but that we were working a lead.

Lemme tell ya, with ol’ Jack on the case, he’d have sniffed out where the kid had been taken. We’d have likely found the girl already, waxed the bad guys that took her, and returned her to her sister. Just something to think about next time the rest of the Prophets’ leave ol’ Jack’s cheese in the wind.


Episode 2: Wrong Side of the Street
Wanted Level: 2

Characters in Attendance:
Jack Russell, Dog Boy Vagabond Delivery Boy
Fer-de-lance, Psi-Stalker Infiltration Expert
Victor “Squirrelmaster” Valentine, Human Hacker
Richard Steele, Human Infiltration Expert and Cleaner
Flint, Psi-Stalker Body Fixer

Characters Not in Attendance:
Sage, Quick Flex Headhunter

Still working to acquire the shipment from the Braineaters, the madhatters that comprise the Prophets of Payne split up and worked their own angles.

Ol’ Jack hung around the park hopin’ to catch the Braineaters in the act of grabbin’ people. It turns out that Ol’ Jack’s nose for trouble was spot on because a few of those wastes of space from the Braineaters showed up a short while later. Ol’ Jack being the good boy that he is, shadowed those maggots all the way to Jake’s Farm. I wasn’t about to go in there so I set up shop on the roof of an empty warehouse within viewing distance of the farm and watched.

The Braineaters hung out near the fruit stand, like it was some sort of damn mini-mart. Must have been about thirty minutes they waited till some fancy car screeches to a halt in front of them. Ol’ Jack got a look at the lady. Couldn’t tell if she was tall or short because she never got out of the car, but she had dark hair, an ugly ass scar on her face, and she wore mirror shades. Kinda reminds me of one of those Golden Age torrents Vic sometimes runs, Men in Black, I think it was called. I couldn’t hear what they said, but ol’ Jack kept his eyes on the car until it disappeared turning onto Tandem Street. I’ll recognize the lady if I see her again. She’s probably the rich Burbie Bitch, I found out about from that big-mouthed Braineater yesterday.

Richard went to visit the Tandem Gang and tried to get them to join in on the action. It sounded like they weren’t convinced Ricky wasn’t trying to set them up, but at least he left in one piece and left it up to them whether or not they’d join us.

Meanwhile back at the Top Hat….

We filled Doc Flint in on what had happened the last few days while he was away. It involved telling Doc someone had hacked his email, and sent several disturbing emails to Cleaver, the leader of the Braineaters that included various photoshopped pictures of him in compromising positions with squirrels. I’m tellin’ ya Vic ain’t right in the head. We also had to explain the necessity and merits of a 50-gallon drum of acid. Doc wasn’t keen on what we intended to do with it, and when he heard our plan to roofie the Blue Sun Guards with a doctored pizza, he took the tranqs and ensured the dose was enough to incapacitate them, but not kill them.

The next order of business was to transport all our gear and stuff to the empty warehouse we were going to use as a staging area. Lemme tell ya somethin’ ol’ Jack has hauled a lot of shady stuff in his time, but between that barrel of acid, and Vic’s mad science experiments, I was feelin’ a mite nervous. That out of the way, yours truly went back to the Top Hat to prepare the buffet.

Ol’ Jack cooked up a couple of pizzas with the works, administered the special sauce, and delivered them to the Blue Sun Guard Shack. It didn’t take too much persuasion on the part of Ol’ Jack to get the guards to take the pizzas. Ol’ Jack hasn’t met the person yet who would turn down free pizza.

Ol’ Jack stashed the car outside the district and high-tailed it back to the warehouse, just in time for the fun to begin. Ferde, Doc, and I ventured over to the other warehouse once Vic killed the live camera feed and made us invisible. Entering the building was a snap.

It was too easy.

It’s been ol’ Jack’s experience that nothing is ever that easy. Inside the warehouse we found some sort of hospital, Doc’s wet dream. There were cots, a clean room, and the entire thing smelled of disinfectant. It didn’t even look like it had been used yet. So what was it going to be used for? Ol’ Jack couldn’t help but think of what we’d learned that people who’d fallen ill were disappearing. Was this supposed to be where they were to be taken. Something didn’t sit right.

Back across the alley, Vic had uninvited guests. A pair of goons wandered in to the warehouse, apparently to check that it was secure. I guess Vic didn’t expect that the warehouse we intended to use to stage our raid from was actually the warehouse where everything was going to be going down.

Yep. You guessed it. We were on the wrong side of the damn street.

Vic tried to bullshit the goons, but they were having none of it. The warehouse was supposed to be empty. He claimed to be a Coalition Food Inspector. The goons tried to grab him. We heard all this on the comms. Ferde and I rushed back across the street leaving Doc behind.

Ol’ Jack took up a position behind some crates and watched as some sort of personnel transport entered the warehouse. It was followed by a combat truck with a laser turret. Following Vic’s lead, Ol’ Jack yelled out “Special Operations, Freeze!” It worked on a couple of the goons. Rick dropped one from upstairs adding to the lie. Apparently, they were expecting the Coalition to be tied up near the hotel investigating the cybersnatching that had occured there, and not conducting a sting operation in the warehouse district. Needless to say a firefight broke out.

Most of the goons that were part of the group ended up with the wind whistling through the hole in their heads. Ricky was down right deadly with his shots. Ol’ Jack heard he even flung his vibro-sword at one of them. Remind me not to get on his bad side.

Realizing they were going down, the leader ordered the trooper behind the transport to open fire on the cargo. Ferde dropped him, but not before he managed to waste two people. One of them was the kid that Ferde had befriended. A rotten situation.

While Doc checked out the people in the transport, and I fixed the tire on it, Rick, Vic, and Ferde interrogated the leader. The leader was apparently more afraid of his boss than he was of us, because he wouldn’t talk. Will was more forth coming but didn’t know much. We learned the Burbie Bitch was from one of the Old Towns, but he didn’t know which one. We let Will live.

We looked for a place to stash the transport, and Ferde began running down her contacts to fence the stuff we took off the gangers that we didn’t want. We told Will to get out of town because the Braineaters would kill him, and so would we if we ever saw his ass again. We’re not the kind of assholes to turn someone loose with no gear. We gave him a knife, a pistol, some provisions, a few credits, and told him to hit the bricks. That done, we started disposing of the remains of the gangers in the vat of “Mega Hot Sauce” which bore a biohazard label and a sticker indicating it belonged to the Firebelly Soup Kitchen.

Word of advice. Don’t get any of it on ya. Ol’ Jack is gonna have to buy a new shirt now since, a bit of it dribbled on him. That shit burns.

Notes: That is where the session ended. We don’t yet know the consequences of our actions.



Destruction’s Journal,

The Heavy Metals succeeded in their objective. With the aid of Devolution’s former assistant they located and entered the lab. It will take some time to figure out exactly what they recovered, though it would seem they recovered a working prototype of Devolution’s Shrink Ray as well. It was fortunate for them as they inadvertently allowed Gupta’s Shrink Ray to fall into the hands of the V’sori, and they were able to use the prototype to return to normal size. I have made recovery of the shrink ray the Heavy Metals next mission as well as a top priority. Such a device in the hands of our enemy could spell disaster.

Speaking of disasters…

Despite their success in completing the mission, that success came at a high price. Gupta was killed shortly after inserting the team. Too bad. His assistance would have made it easier to sort out the recovered items. I can only imagine how little Danielle feels knowing her father is not coming home. Since she and the little dragon, Kanna seem to have hit it off, I have instructed Valerie Ramirez to take her to the Heavy Metals. Perhaps having a noncombatant to look after will at last temper the foolhardy nature of the Heavy Metals, but I have my doubts.

Gupta was not the only death during the operation. The five members of the missing hero team known as the Enigma Chasers also perished. No one knew what became of them. One day while investigating a mystery involving Dr. Devolution they simply vanished. Apparently, Devolution grew tired of their interference in his work, shrunk them to the size of ants, and released them into his yard. They were discovered by the Heavy Metals alive and living in Devolution’s backyard. The little dragon rescued one of them from being eaten by goblins and they joined with the Heavy Metals to find the lab.

The members of Enigma Chasers would have been a welcome addition to Omega. Alas, through the incompetence in part of the Heavy Metals, the Enigma Chasers were killed in combat with the the giant ants protecting Devolution’s lab. Granted the Enigma Chasers were part and parcel to their own destruction, but the decision to attack the ants head on was foolhardy. The Enigma Chasers were torn apart by ants. It was clear to me that the Heavy Metals believed the Enigma Chasers could handle a few ants having lived in the yard for several years, but none of them could know that the members of the Enigma Chasers did not possess the same level of abilities they themselves possess. The dragon managed to save one of them, but then proceeded to unintentionally cause the young woman to flee in terror when presented with the headless body of her robotic canine companion. She would soon be torn apart by ants as well. Such a tragic loss of life that could have been prevented.

The Heavy Metals have opted to link their base with the lab, using Devolution’s Mole to drill a tunnel between the two locations. I feel this to be highly dangerous. If the V’sori discover it, not only will the Heavy Metals be in danger, but the Underground Resistance as well. I will need to convince them this is not in their best interest. For now though I need their focus to be on recovering Gupta’s Shrink Ray.